I Love Lucy S02 E11 – Pregnant Women Are Unpredictable

Original Air Date: December 15, 1952

Quick! Get Nancy Grace to hair and makeup!

Because we open on Lucy “taking care” of a practice baby doll. It’s the creepy sort of doll that makes you fear death in a new way. Lucy holds it under her armpit, throws it around, drowns it.

I Love Lucy S02 E11 Lucy with Baby Doll

Considering how much that doll looks like Satan, hold it however you want.

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I Love Lucy S01 E33 – Lucy’s Schedule

Original air date: May 26, 1952

We open on Ricky pacing around in a suit, fidgeting while Lucy takes her sweet-ass time in the bedroom.

Lucy keeps saying, “I’ll be ready in a minute, dear,” which means an hour because she’s got to put on her makeup, hair products, fake eyelashes, etc. Underneath all the beauty treatments, Lucille Ball was inspiration for The Walking Dead.

“I’ll be ready in a minute, dear.”

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I Love Lucy S01 E22 – Fred and Ethel Fight

(Or: FINALLY! Go get yours, Ethel!)

**More WTFacts are at this week’s Episode Watch Party.**

We open on Lucy setting the table for dinner and Ricky playing peekaboo because the guy legit thinks he’s married a 6 month old. 

“WHOM is coming to dinner?” Ricky asks, all proud of himself like he checked fucking Grammar Girl or something. Except he clearly didn’t, because WHOM is incorrect.
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I Love Lucy S01 E15 – Lucy Plays Cupid

(OR: Lucy is assaulted twice, then traded on the black market.) 

**Wanna keep up? Episode Watch Party!**

Oh my, Ballers. Where do we even start this week? I’m going to start at the beginning, but be warned: there will be a detour. I’ve been waiting for this episode, and dreading it.

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I Love Lucy S01 E10 – Lucy Is Jealous of Girl Singer

(Or: Lucy is jealous of girl dancer, because the ho never sings a note.)

**Keep up with the action. Episode watch party!**

We open on Lucy vacuuming, when Ethel comes in and surprises her, making her scream. Then Lucy – the screaming, vacuuming hypocrite – tells Ethel to be quiet because Ricky’s asleep.

Ethel doesn’t mind. She’s on a high. A schadenfruede-fueled, worst-friend-ever high. She’s giddy because the newspaper says Ricky’s cheating on Lucy with his new showgirl. You know that thrill you get when you find out your closest friend’s life is about to fall apart? Yeah me neither. But Ethel does. Ethel is a sociopath.

Lucy believes her, so she beats the shit out of Ricky with a newspaper like the slimy insect he is. He’s like, HAHAHAHA. Ricky is also a sociopath.

Ricky: I’m as faithful as an old dog.
Lucy: Yeah, old Rover.

We know your type, Ricardo:

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