I Love Lucy S02 E11 – Pregnant Women Are Unpredictable

Original Air Date: December 15, 1952

Quick! Get Nancy Grace to hair and makeup!

Because we open on Lucy “taking care” of a practice baby doll. It’s the creepy sort of doll that makes you fear death in a new way. Lucy holds it under her armpit, throws it around, drowns it.

I Love Lucy S02 E11 Lucy with Baby Doll

Considering how much that doll looks like Satan, hold it however you want.

She even covers it in talcum powder / baby powder. That’s Flint water level dangerous. Don’t use that stuff, friends.

Ricky gets home and lectures her about not sleeping enough. He should know: he was a fetus once so he’s a pregnancy expert.

I Love Lucy S02 E11 Ricky and Baby Lecture Lucy

Lucy’s Lamaze class will just be Ricky yelling at her.

Lucy is going back and forth with names. Ironically there’s a running theme this whole episode about how she can’t decide on a name and changes her mind all the time. But WE already know they name the baby Ricky. Of. fucking. course they do.

Lucy: I want the names to be unique and euphonious.
Ricky: OK. Unique if it’s a boy and Euphonius if it’s a girl.
Lucy: How about Phillip for a boy?
Ricky: (Holding cigarette) And Morris if it’s a girl?

My recs:

  • Dick Ardo Ricardo
  • Mick R. Gough Ricardo
  • Bob

Ricky makes them both breakfast in the morning because Lucy’s doing her duty for the first time since they got married. She is finally an incubator. And much like the tech incubators of today, she will become too big for her own good and the resulting product will be attractive but not behave properly.

Ricky can’t find anything in the kitchen. Not even the jokes, apparently. They spend 10 minutes showing us how inept he is. It’s like Bernie’s opening statements at the debate. We freaking know. You’ve said this before. Let’s move on to the good stuff.

I Love Lucy S02 E11 Ricky looks in kichen

Make something happen. If I wanted to watch 30 minutes of people looking through the kitchen for stuff, I could’ve chosen to blog every episode of Hoarders instead.

Fred comes in and tells Ricky about how pregnant women are unpredictable “creatures.” I would comment but as a “creature” I’m anger-molting.

Ricky: Being an expectant father is pretty tough on a man.

They make a new dish called crapwaffles and leave the kitchen in worse condition than we left Iraq. Lucy and Ethel find the mess later:

Lucy: It’s the idea that counts.

No it isn’t.

Lucy: It just shows how much he loves me.

No it doesn’t.

But then Lucy starts to worry: what if Ricky is only being nice to her because of the baby?

Lucy: He never treated me this nice when it was just me.
Ethel: You’re just being crazy.

No she isn’t.

I Love Lucy S02 E11 Kitchen is Messy

Sadly the Walking Dead attacked while Ricky made breakfast. He had no chance of survival. He was too pretty.

Lucy has a sad realization:

Lucy: After the baby’s born I’ll be just like a salmon: I’ll swim upstream, spawn, and then never be heard from again.

She makes a good point. We really need to be doing more to protect the salmon population in this country.

Ricky hasn’t forgotten Lucy, though! He brought her presents:

  • a rattle – Lucy: “Just what I’ve always wanted”
  • a bonnet – What Fred’s first girlfriend wore on the Oregon Trail.
  • a diaper – The perfect place to put all your thoughts about these gifts
I Love Lucy S02 E11 Lucy with Bonnet

Men, take a long look at her face. This is what “I’m not interested in what you’re trying to give me” body language looks like.

Upset, the womb with feet walks out crying. Ethel tries to explain Lucy’s behavior to Ricky, and she recommends he take Lucy out for dinner and dancing.

So he sends an orchid and some chocolates, and he takes her out to his club, along with Fred and Ethel.

Pro tip: when your wife wants to know you care about her, don’t take her to your office.

Ethel’s wearing a full gown and Lucy’s in a muu muu – rub it in, Ethel. We get it: you still look great and Lucy’s a bloated human stroller. You don’t need to lay it on so thick. 

Fred will keep her in line, though:

Ethel: (Re: Fred’s dancing) He puffs so much it’s like dancing with a steam engine.
Fred: Steam engines always puff when they’re carrying a heavy load.

Lucy asks them to stop bickering… and we get this amazing moment:

Ethel: We’re not bickering, that’s how we make love.

OMG I KNEW IT. MAKES PERFECT SENSE.

I Love Lucy S02 E11 Lucy and Ricky Dance with Fred and Ethel ball gowns

Ethel: Now who’s getting the fat jokes, beyotch.

And then Ricky and Lucy dance.

Now if you’re thinking to yourself, “Geez, where was the plot in all that? You would be totally justified because this thing meandered more than Donald Trump on Planned Parenthood. It’s like the writers knew they didn’t need a plot at this point because they already had everyone so enchanted, and their bosses were so baby-crazy they wouldn’t care.

This episode, my friends, is what we in comedy call a “sketch.” Sketches usually run 3-4 minutes. 

So it’s not that pregnant women are unpredictable. It’s that a pregnant woman’s employees are lazy. That’s better.

_
Join me next week for S02 E12: Lucy’s Show Biz Swan SongNew posts on Fridays! 

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I Love Lucy S02 E11 Ricky and Lucy dance happy

Ugh. They’re gonna look so adorable covered in spit up.

2 thoughts on “I Love Lucy S02 E11 – Pregnant Women Are Unpredictable

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