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I Love Lucy S02 E10 – Lucy Is Enceinte

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Original Air Date: December 8, 1952

We open on Lucy preparing her purse to go to the doctor because she’s been feeling “dauncy.” I dunno what dauncy means, but I’m assuming it means blatantly lacking a period because our girl is pregnant.

She doesn’t know it, though. She sleeps in a twin bed… I doubt she knows her body all that well.

Maybe the censors cut the line where she says, “I mean I’m three weeks late but then I haven’t had a heavy period since I started the pill and besides I wouldn’t be able to tell anyway because I put an extra large diva cup in a few days early this time.”

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I Love Lucy S01 E28 – Cuban Pals

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(Or: Lucy Tries to Help Trump Build a Wall)

Original air date: April 21, 1952

Ballers, did you see the debate? No, not the Republican debate. I mean the debate over who should play Ricky in the new Lucy biopic. I suppose if it can’t be me (and it can’t), one of those guys would do.

We open on Lucy fixing the flowers because her life is interesting. She’s also setting up hors d’oeuvres. (I HATE the phrase “hors d’oeuvres.” It’s impossible. I almost took up French just so I didn’t feel stupid trying to spell it. My dad calls them “horse divers.” I prefer the spelling “Whore Dervs,” which is also the name of my favorite slutty diesel engine road vehicle.)

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I Love Lucy S01 E11 – Drafted

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(Or: They Said Report to Fort Dix. Get Your Mind Out of the Gutter.)

**Keep up with the action. Episode watch party!**

Hey, Ballers! Episode 11 already? Sigh. They grow up so quickly.

Let’s do this! 

We open on Lucy sweeping – PHEW! A welcome break from her usual vacuuming! Ethel comes with the mail and Lucy passes over a stack of bills (we know, Lucy, you don’t pay them).

Ethel has read Lucy’s mail, which Lucy despises. She turns all Edward Snowden, talking about how people’s mail is sacred and opening it is a betrayal. Then she opens Ricky’s mail.

Letter: “You are hereby ordered to report to Fort Dix, New Jersey, Monday at 3 o’clock.”

So now Lucy assumes Ricky’s been drafted. As world’s worst friend, Ethel feels nothing. She tells Lucy to go and buy a new hat. As world’s worst wife, Lucy’s like “OK.”

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